Thursday, March 6, 2014

Gentle Lent: Singing Redeemer

My mind focused on Gentle Lent and a pounding heart, I made it to Ash Wednesday service last night.  I was five minutes late. All had ashes on their forehead, but I sat bravely. Choosing to be open.

Photo taken by Ladyheart
The service was set in a different part of the church campus. We usually attend the contemporary service on Sunday. This was the traditional service sanctuary. Taking a deep breath, I sat down. A pipe organ began to play. I turned to see a beautiful facade of pipes. As all began to sing an older hymn, I glanced around the room. The ceiling was wrapped in the arms of pipe rooms.

The tightness in my lungs eased. I grew up listening to my Mom practice the organ for Sunday service as a child. There is something about a room made into an instrument that grounds me.

Tears began to fall. I was able to worship.

Corporate readings and the pastor’s message had words in them like:

God’s Wrath

YET, I felt no shame. The word Love was said more. All of us, equally, sat in that room as sinners. We all had offense to confess. But it didn't stop there. The focus was that we all were to receive forgiveness. For where there is forgiveness of sin there is love, life and redemption.

Tears leaked as I felt a burden ease. I didn't need to wade through Spiritual Abuse in some form of a list to check off. Healing wasn't going to come with me digging holes into my psyche.

It was Freedom. Healing would come as I walked in the freedom I received. Freedom celebrated last year with a tattoo of a bird sitting on a branch. This Lent is not a start something new, but a continuation. Divine Love will correct the Bad Theology my flesh holds so dear. New Life will be the fount from where my Kindness Risks flow.

I met with Him today through an emailed devotional from that church titled: I Sing of My Redeemer. The author used a few verses, but this one struck me:

The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17

Photo taken by jschumacher
I grabbed my Praying In Color sheet and wrote:

Singing Redeemer

For three minutes, I doodled within the boundaries of that small square. It flavored my though as I attended today’s Lenten Cleaning chore.

I sing because I’m happy
I sing because I’m free
For his eye is on the sparrow
And I know He watches me.

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